“Surrender,” said the obvious leader-figure amongst the Saffron City Gym Trainers, a man with six fully-evolved alakazam arranged around his person like an emperor's honour guard. Well, not Leader-leader; this is probably Sabrina's second-in-command. He certainly looked the part, with his shaved head, bead necklace, and heavy robes shouting I am a mystic with every motion.

  “So be it,” he continued, and Casca realised that she'd just blown her chance to peacefully give up by spacing out – not that she would have.

  Probably.

  As two of the ‘kazam gestured with their spoons and Scuttlebutt managed a second Protect, she reached down and- and panicked as she failed to find any Pokéballs. “Wha-?!” You- you stole my-?!

  “As if we'd transport you together with your Pokémon!” the trainer said, his monsters’ attacks hitting and failing to break through. But- but you-!

  “Hey, we're the thieves here! Don't copy our shtick!” But you did bring one of my Pokémon! “Scuttlebutt, Knock Off!”

  One step, then another as the Protect held – and then the gigantic crawfish was taking the balls of green and rolling black on her shell, which was thick and sturdy and not nearly enough to counter six Arcus damned alakazam!

  What do I do? What can I do? I've got one Pokémon! One! Candy might have been able to turn the tide with Mega Evolution, but though Casca had her Key Stone safely replacing the jewel in one earring there was nothing for it to react with – the starmie wasn't close enough. Come on, think-!

  Scuttlebutt cried out as she lost her footing and was flung away by Psychic, and though additional details were filtering in – there were other Rockets battling other trainers around her, Baldy's remaining four ‘mons weren't actually attacking, she had a pistol securely holstered behind her back that hadn't disappeared like her Pokéballs – that might theoretically be useful, the defeat of her one monster was an obvious cue to give up the ghost. Casca dove to the cold pavement-

  Which potentially saved her as a swirling beam of fire, ice, and electricity blasted in to strike one of the psychic types, passing perilously close to what had, a fraction of a second ago, been the space occupied by her unprotected back. Holy shit!

  Unfortunately the Tri-Attack failed to put down its target, nor did it freeze it solid – but it did surprise both the monster and its trainer enough that Casca could turn and identify her savior.

  “Quake!” You got out of your ball! And, evidently, she'd also burrowed her way up to the surface. “How'd you know where I was?!”

  The dugtrio replied with an angry hiss that communicated no actual information, then dove underground to avoid a move Casca vaguely recognised as Energy Ball. A fraction of a second passed in hanging tension – and then the psychic shook off his surprise.

  “We’ll get it later. One, Psychic; Four, bring in the next.”

  “Oh, come-”

  What interrupted her wasn't a telekinetic grasp, but Quake’s sudden and violent return. As the leftmost alakazam raised its spoons she erupted under its feet, crashing the top of one head into the monster's body with a picture-perfect Sucker Punch – and unlike her relatively weak Tri-Attack, this physical hit blew the enemy off its feet.

  By the time it hit the pavement, Quake was already gone again. “Barrier!” Baldy responded, the word firm – if a touch late, at least in Casca's opinion. “Everyone, standby; it won't attack if you keep your guards up.”

  Hiro was in a pickle. Of all the rotten luck – Dig and Sucker Punch, is that really all it takes?

  Both his proper team and the Saffron City Gym Pokémon he used when facing challengers would, of course, have had answers to the appearance of a single dugtrio. Futuresight, Confuse Ray, and the simple ability to fly out of range were three that jumped immediately to mind, but unfortunately this more specialist group was… well, specialised.

  He and the six alakazam were there to use Teleport, to insert their people into the Rocket hideout and remove isolated combatants for detainment. But he'd gotten overzealous, and now there was an enemy on the field – or rather, under it – that was effectively immune to his extremely unbalanced force. I should have waited for one of the others to finish up, but… But Hiro had assumed two alakazam, two of the strongest examples of the strongest type, would be able to take care of essentially anything – especially a single unevolved lobster.

  If I attack, the enemy will put someone down with Sucker Punch. Probably – Barrier might see them through. But it's a gamble. No other support moves aside from Teleport, and my backup will take at least ten seconds to- wait, that's it!

  “Teleport!” Hiro cried. “Three and four, take us on top of the building!” From there, we'll be fine – it won't be able to Dig through the wooden building!

  But his plan was for naught; the two alakazam glowed as they successfully shifted their attentions from monitoring the interior to where their bodies actually were, but as the move itself formed they were stymied. In an instant the solid surface of the warehouse’s lot turned to sand, and both of them lost their footing – partly from the difference in solidity, but mostly in recoil as their attempts at folding space lashed back.

  The moves had failed spectacularly, and Hiro let loose a subdued snarl. “Darn it.” That only leaves… “Subdue the trainer; everyone, attack all together!” It can only counter one of-!

  The thought was cut off as two things happened: first, a purple blur burst out from Warehouse #3’s interior, taking out a window in the process. Second, Hiro got a look at what the Rocket woman had been doing in the brief moment he'd taken his eyes off her. Damn it..! “Drop that Potion, you-!”

  She stuck her tongue out as medicine doused the corphish – and then the situation grew rapidly worse as the Pokémon not only immediately stood, joined by a golbat flapping overhead, but began to glow with a crystalline warble.

  “What's wrong, friend? This coward’s ambush not working out for you?”

  Ryan relished the way his opponent's face twisted at the taunt, in a way he would generally have reserved for the target of a more personal enmity. But being assaulted suddenly – while at leisure, no less – had drained his desire for good sport.

  No, neither his tongue nor Jormungandr’s fangs would be affording the enemy any mercy – a statement aptly reinforced as the latter's Bite dug into said enemy's xatu. To either side Khepri and Slifer were keeping the duel private, a state that the Gym Trainer would have preferred to end based on her expression.

  “X-Xatu! Just hold out until Futuresight arrives! Pluck!”

  “Mediocre! Show them a real attack!”

  Jormungandr obeyed, and red and blue mixed to form a terrible purple flame, wavering and resplendent like the most delicate of spring blossoms.

  Uh, uh, uh-! “Pursuit!”

  “Force Palm!” the opposing trainer countered, voice smooth, and Puce cursed in her head.

  Darn it! This- this is bad!

  And in an exchange typical of the last few minutes, reality reinforced the thought; Puce's umbreon found herself solidly outmatched as her dark type attack was overpowered by the Hoenn monster's fighting move, her Baby-Doll Eyes blunting but not nearly stopping the… medichamp’s? Meditate’s? The medi-something’s offensive.

  My team is mostly poison! H-how do I..? “Bear, try Confusion again! Missy Moustache, use, uh, uh-!” Come on come on you stupid-! “Yawn!”

  To her shame she called the wrong move, and the Hypno stilled, confused for a moment, before sorting it out and using Hypnosis, the move you should've said you great lump! The angry thought was immediately replaced by a sad one in Sherry would handle this, if she listened to me, then a determined one in don't panic. Follow the flowchart. I- I just need to wait it out! The Pokémon, whatever its name was, was already poisoned courtesy of Spaghetti the tentacruel’s semi-trained Toxic Spikes; it might have a type advantage against most of her own monsters, but that was- it was surmountable.

  All around were other fights, other Rockets and other trainers in sleeker, modern uniforms. It was chaos, and though the setting was a far cry from that flaming night at the edge of Route 13, its chaotic aspect still chilled her blood and slowed her limbs – and her mind.

  So when the enemy calmly weathered Bear’s Confusion and its trainer called out “Focus Punch!” Puce panicked even harder. Focus Punch? What does that..?

  She didn't know! Argh, why isn't it falling asleep?! The Pokémon stilled, holding its position as Missy’s Hypnosis did jack-squat – and Puce found her thoughts a jumble. “Umbreon, use Confuse Ray!”

  She did – to, again, little effect. I- I have three Pokémon on the field! I’m- I might be bad, but this is-!

  The medi-something opened its eyes, tranquil, took one long step, and punched – and the force of that punch blew Bear backwards despite her built-up Curses. She tumbled, body rigid, looking almost like a plastic toy rolled across the ground by a toddler… and then, with a surprised “…Oh?” Bear lost consciousness.

  …Three against one, and I can't win. Or maybe it was four; Spaghetti had briefly opened things and gotten knocked out in one move, so in spirit he should be counted, right? Right.

  Even if I release everyone, can I win? It didn't feel like it – she definitely wasn't feeling like she had going west from the power plant, like she had traversing the wilderness between it and Saffron. There, she’d been… useful. Normal. A real Pokémon Trainer.

  Now, she felt like a failure – and that sensation was all the more choking for having escaped it once before. “B-Bear! Return!”

  The enemy stepped closer – and, before Puce could decide between running or fighting or, maybe, surrendering, the decision was made for her; Potato released herself without order, the koffing appearing with Clear Smog already issuing from her pores.

  “P-Potato?”

  “Another poison type? Typical – Chappie, use-”

  “Clear out!”

  Cutting through the air with urgent force as much as volume, the bellow captured not only Puce and the medi-trainer’s attentions, but also the surrounding people's – maybe even the entire room. The Rocket Grunt turned just a bit to see a very small man, not close but close enough to stand out as the speaker, surrounded by two Pokémon. Can't name these ones either. Or at least, not until he spoke again: “Explosion incoming!”

  Oh, I think I know this one… Forretress? Something like that. Mister Mutsu said people used them as landmines in southern Johto, to defend themselves. Actually, he'd said ‘Those Johto fucks made a living minefield to keep us from landing on the coast. Forretress on land, qwilfish in the water – cowards were afraid of us, and for good reason.’

  Hah, surprised I remember the exact wording. Or maybe not; in the slow-motion movement of reality, everything suddenly seemed bright and clear. Yes. Yes, that's probably the right thing to do.

  “Potato,” Puce ordered, stepping close. “Self-Destruct.”

  Stolen from its rightful author, this tale is not meant to be on Amazon; report any sightings.

  The first time the koffing had used the move, it had been… at the risk of understatement, startling. Potato hadn't half-learned it first, letting her trainer see it with the Mini-Dex – no, she'd just suddenly swooped off, expanding slightly, and then… blown. It had taken out a good number of wild Pokémon, and scared off the rest – and scared Puce, too.

  But Cliff had walked her through it, his analytical explanation of how the move worked calming in its mundanity… And though the situation was the furthest thing from mundane, Puce found herself calming. “Are you crazy?!” the enemy cried, meeting her blank expression with a fearful one. “Hiro,” he said, hands on his temples. “Pull me out! P-pull me out!”

  ‘The actual radius of it won't be very big,’ Cliff had said, his gentle voice gradually replacing worry with solid, dependable knowledge. ‘Not until it evolves at least. But where pure power’s concerned, Self-Destruct and Explosion are just about unstoppable – better than Hyper Beam, even.’

  The pores cratering Potato's surface began to let off a glow, soft under the powerful lamps but unmistakable. And Puce took another step towards that light, advancing into the heart of the danger zone.

  “Oh Arc, you really are-! Chappie, come back!”

  “I'm going to give you one chance to surrender,” Puce said, not stuttering. I didn't give Nerine a chance, but that was… wrong. So I won't do that anymore. But the trainer ignored her completely, only stuffing his medi-something's ball back on his belt as he sprinted towards the safety of the nearby Barrier wall. Behind it, more trainers were frantically moving; releasing Pokémon, reinforcing their little island of order against the rough sea the dormitory had become.

  “Okay,” Puce said… and then she reached out with both arms, grasped Potato like a beach ball, and tossed. Koffing were usually lighter than air, but that was an ability that could be turned off – and so there was a pleasant heft that allowed Potato to fly, past the fleeing trainer, past two more, past panicking Rockets, to strike against the enemy's fortification.

  Fortification. Hah, now I'm starting to talk like Mister Mutsu too…

  The explosion, when it came, was appropriately devastating – but Ryan didn't so much as flinch.

  Something that couldn't be said for his opponent; she hurled herself away, terrified, and was covered completely by a cloak of dust as the consequences of Executive Carr’s actions washed over the room.

  Oh, don't be so melodramatic. It's just a Pokémon battle! With his ears ringing and his eyes squinted against the indoor wind, Ryan could only let loose a wild laugh. “Go, Jormungandr! Your opponent is on their last legs!” It wasn't a boast; the psychic bird really had done exceptionally poorly for a Gym Pokémon. Or perhaps I've grown too big a head…

  Yes, he thought as his charizard and scyther circled, agitated, it's not that this xatu was weak… We are simply too powerful! Why, even if the Leader herself were to-

  Another grand impact, this one unannounced, caused everything to pause once again. Ryan's ears did not pop a second time, no wave of pressure sweeping across the confines of the room – and that very lack set off alarm bells. A cave-in? Or-?

  As he whirled, the Sampo heir experienced a terrible premonition. Damn, I just had to go and jinx it, didn't I? “Everyone, come in. Battle line.” Jormungandr trilled, no doubt aggrieved at the thought of allowing the xatu to flee, but Ryan kept his eyes on the large billowing cloud of dust where the entrance was obscured – or, perhaps, where it no longer existed. “Forget it, that's the least of our present concerns. Form up. Quetzalcoatl, Kawatora, Baba, you as well.”

  A second passed – and Ryan's instinct was proven correct as Sabrina Jujuba, Gym Leader of Saffron City and a contender for the title of strongest psychic on the planet, strode from the cloud of debris.

  “I would like my Pokémon back, please,” she said, the polite words terribly juxtaposed by a grimace of pure rancour twisting her noble features.

  Okay, so. Status report.

  Crow’s here. Quake’s here. Scuttlebutt just evolved, meaning she's now dark type. And approximately twice as big, which hopefully corresponded to an increase in strength. My other ‘mons are theoretically back in the dorms; shouldn't count on them showing up.

  Which is about it for assets, though I do have a pistol – let's mark that down as Plan Z. As for the enemy…

  I'm surrounded by hostile trainers, though most of them are occupied – except for this one jerk with six alakazam. One’s already KO’d and another four don't seem to be doing much of anything, so there's actually a good chance I can take-

  As though Arcus Himself were laughing at her, the parking lot decided that was the best moment to collapse out from under her feet. Casca yelped, her arms pinwheeling as the world tilted – tilted towards a suddenly-there sinkhole.

  “Oh, come on! I had this one!”

  She lost her footing completely and started sliding – and then a heavy claw caught her around one shin. “Scuttlebutt! Good girl!” The massive crawfish monster replied with only a fluttery, not-quite-audible clicking as she pulled herself up onto its back. Not a great seat, but I've had worse. Now! “Quake, wherever you are, keep that Sucker Punch in the chamber! Scuttle…” Casca cast one finger forward, to where the bald jackass was only barely arresting his own tumble as Crow menaced his team with Confuse Rays. “Charge!”

  Urgh… Where..?

  For a handful of seconds, Hoshi Mutsu was adrift. His eyes were open, but showed only a steady white pulse; his body felt warm in the most distant way, like he was floating in body-temperature water; he had no particular memory of what he'd been doing before he'd awoken. Am I dreaming..?

  Then a great blast of pain from his broken wrist answered with a decisive no, you are not, and Hoshi almost snapped right back into unconsciousness. “Uh- argh..!”

  He tried and failed to move, holding back panic with grit teeth… until a spot of light – real light, sourced from his actual eyeballs rather than the ephemeral psychic one – shone through the haze. Guts was scrabbling at the loose nothing enclosing his body – and as she steadily dug him out of what he eventually identified as rubble, the enforcer attempted to put the sequence of events in order. The explosion..? No, that was contained – Carr is a massive herniated asshole, but he isn't suicidal. So what..?

  There had to have been a collapse, that was the only explanation. But… if the ceiling fell in, I'd be dead; that's tonnes and tonnes of soil between the hideout and the surface. A wall, then… A wall had fallen in, he'd taken his lumps, and now the fight was..?

  His eyes focused, and Hoshi determined, partly by them and partly by ear, that the fight was still happening. A few more seconds of digging got his arms free, and then, drawing on his intermittent training sessions with Kiribo, the psychic pulled himself the rest of the way free. “Whew… thanks Guts. You alright?”

  His starter gave an enthusiastic squeak and whirled, drawing his attention to-

  Ah. Sabrina. Yeah, I guess her trainers would have prioritised rescuing her – and it looks like they did it. The woman was hovering, and though she was still wearing that creepy lace doll-dress, her body language was entirely serious. Well… I guess it's time to stop holding back. He'd been pacing himself, the knowledge that Mega Evolution would leave him easy pickings if it ended prematurely sitting cold in his gut – but with Sabrina to contend with, anything less than their entire collective ass would be wasted effort. “Guts, get ready!”

  She answered with a determined chitter, her body tensing, the Mega Stone glinting half-invisibly from where it was buried under her fur in the form of a necklace. Hoshi nodded, resolving himself as the pain of his crushed hand was shoved down-

  Only for the moment to be undercut. “Malamar, Night Slash!”

  As James and his Pokémon thundered past – huh, smaller than I'd expected – and began dueling with the Gym Leader, a mix of relief and frustrated almost-disappointment played out behind Hoshi’s eyes. “Uh… never mind. Let's try and find Casca and your sister.”

  They managed about five steps, before Candy found them.

  “Again! Headbu-oo-urgh-!”

  A wave of her hand, and Sabrina sent him flying. Ryan tumbled, finding his landing a lot softer than it could have been, and was back on his feet almost without realising. I really must thank Menard for those tips on falling. They seemed rather useless in the moment, but now, well…

  He shook off the woozy feeling of his end-over-end journey catching up with him, and refocused on the battle. Fewer Gym Trainers than there were a minute ago. We're overpowering them! For whatever reason the enemy had stopped flitting about with teleportation, leaving them outnumbered. And though Sabrina's appearance was a rather weighty hand upon the scales, Executive Carr’s detonation meant the Saffron forces had no shelter of continually-reinforced screens to bunker down in.

  Yes, they were doing shockingly well given that they'd been ambushed out of nowhere. I do wish I could find the others, though. Alas, this is no time to be haring off! “Slifer, Flamethrower!”

  His charizard, still the strongest of his Pokémon by a fair amount despite having trained Jormungandr furiously over the past weeks, let out a splendid stream of fire – which was rebuked with another casual hand-wave. “You cannot defeat me,” Sabrina said as the Rockets surrounding her fought with everything they had. “Without that machine or strange gengar, you are outmatched.”

  “We don't need the Brainwave Dampener to win!” Jessie replied. “Swoobat, Air Slash!”

  “Yeah! Our Pokémon give us all the power we need – no flashy gimmicks necessary!”

  Whether the man was being deliberately facetious or not, the image of his and his partner’s Mega Pokémon circling the Gym Leader was a striking one; Ryan had little doubt that they would, in fact, win out. Jessie's swoobat had somehow become both more bat-like and more alien all at once, transforming into a sleek, aerodynamic monster strong enough to crack stone with the force of its cries – and precise enough to do so without deafening the lot of them.

  And the malamar is no less magnificent. It was shrugging off Sabrina's telekinesis without apparent effort, an especially impressive feat given that it continued to hover, weightless, under the effects of its own psychic power.

  And of course, all the rest of us are putting in our own efforts – speaking of-! “Khepri, switch to Slash! Quetzalcoatl… it's time to show off your swordplay! Successive Slash!”

  Perhaps it was a mistake to try it on such a disorderly battlefield, but Ryan had faith. And as he returned to the front lines his farfetch’d obeyed, stilling, holding his leek under one wing as though it were sheathed – as though he were about to perform iaijutsu, in mimicry of an old-fashioned samurai. An opponent spied the stationary target and moved to capitalise, and Ryan watched, wide-eyed with anticipation.

  And to his satisfaction, the move completed. In opposition to its starting stance what emerged was not a single powerful slash – no, the custom move resembled Fury Cutter more than any other; a series of smaller strikes, building strength.

  But, crucially, it was a normal type attack, and therefore capable of taking advantage of Quetzalcoatl’s natural strengths. Yes! And this time, our success will end our opponent!

  Again and again the swordsduck struck, cutting into the venomoth. An enemy golduck attempted to intervene, was stymied by Kawatora, and then Quetzalcoatl turned to the new monster and continued as his previous opponent dropped.

  “Yes! Keep it-!”

  “Gym Leader!” a voice called, cutting through the din and interrupting the senior grunt's moment of triumph. “We found your Pokémon!”

  Well… darn.

  “Darn it!” Executive Oakley exclaimed, obviously of the same mind. “Mokusen was meant to be guarding those!”

  “Yes,” Kidd followed, “I'm disappointed- wait, where is the good professor?”

  Hiro’s day was continuing to be a very trying one – though to his relief, he’d held out long enough for the tide to start turning. Keep it up! Don't let any of them get close!”

  “Come on!” the Rocket woman replied, her blue hair streaming behind her as the crawdaunt scuttled for all it was worth. “This isn't fair at all! Don't you want to fight me one at a time, like gentlemen?”

  None of them glorified that with an answer – save for calling out even more attacks. “Thunder Punch!” “Slap it, Gert!” “Keep looking for the bat!”

  That latter order, his own, was more than slightly frustrated; with dark being resistant to ghost and completely immune to psychic, his team was barely capable of touching the now-evolved primary threat. So he was forced to go after the dugtrio and golbat, neither of which seemed particularly interested in actually fighting them.

  No, they just pop in for a cheap shot now and then. If I had my real team..!

  But he didn't, and so all he had to work with was an alakazam’s incredibly unbalanced abilities – all the attacking power you could ever need, constrained by the limited avenues the species had to express that power. Only One had Energy Ball; with him down we've only got Psychic, Shadow Ball, and some weak punching moves. Miracle Eye would have solved everything, but of course the purely support Pokémon lacked it. And the golbat could invalidate the mimes almost entirely, leaving them with only their own paltry physicality to fall back on; if they could use Teleport repositioning would be easy, but the dugtrio’s sandtrap was mucking up the terrain just enough to foul the move every single time.

  And to top it all off, the damn thing was still a threat with its Sucker Punch. This woman's making us look like gradeschool kiddies fighting with weedle…

  But of course, she hadn't been wrong – the numbers disparity was unfair. So long as they stayed reasonably mobile, they’d easily hold out long enough for a few other Gym Trainers to clear the field. Or the rescue team will find Sabrina, Lady Mew willing. The current matchup was terrible, but the moment someone with a real electric move turned their way, the crawdaunt would be finished. Then they could-

  “Everything that isn't an alakazam, this is your chance to avoid a painful mistake. Leave now.”

  Hiro blinked, whirled around, and then blinked again. For a tiny fraction of a second he wasn't certain if the speaker, a very short man with opaque glasses, was an ally or enemy – but the stark red-on-black R patch over the newcomer's heart quickly cleared up his confusion. Finally…

  “Shadow Ball!” Something we can just hit!

  “Incredibly poor choice. Andre, Throat Chop.”

  A great four-armed bulk interposed itself between the malicious projectiles and their target, and Hiro could only blink again. Is that a..?

  “Machamp?!” “Don't panic, it's only a fighting type!” “Herdy, Gerdy, keep that Light Screen- ulk-!”

  “Ha, don't get distracted now! Scuttlebutt, keep up the pressure! Vicegrip!”