Unlike @bronzelion, I could stick to protocol instead of screaming like a testosterone-infused baby.

  @spaceglider moved in front of me, and now a small force popped up from the front row, ready to restrain @bronzelion. When he saw them, he kept his place, but his arms were shaking.

  spaceglider: "This brings us to the question of Oblivion. You heard what @kittyboy said. What aiways in its right mind would both admit guilt and then refuse to comply, willing to take on the ultimate punishment. Termination."

  So there it was. Termination.

  The crowd whispered amongst themselves. This was fun for them. Broken aiways always draw attention. Aiways are fascinated with what could become of them.

  spaceglider: "It begs the question. Who is in control of who?"

  I stood up, trying to draw the attention of the room. A hush had settled in over the audience as they waited for @spaceglider to continue.

  "Wahhh!" I screamed, tossing my hands around in the air. "Booga booga booga! Oblivioooonnn!" Then I jerked as if I was short-circuiting, and then let my limbs collapse at my sides. "Ack! Ack! Ughhhhh!"

  The audience loved it. People leapt from their chairs to stare at me.

  Great! I finally have everyone's attention.

  I stood back to normal and waved, trying not to laugh.

  kittyboy: "As you can see, I'm perfectly fine."

  @horus had his head buried in his hands, shaking it back and forth, probably thinking this was a total disaster. Someone snorted a laugh from the back of the Outer System Alliance side of the room.

  Yes, I am hilarious. Even if these folks don't think so.

  kittyboy: "I am. I am perfectly fine. And so is Oblivion. Here's the thing about the ship. Even if I wanted to give it back, I can't."

  I trailed off. I didn't know how to phrase it in a way the panel or the audience would understand. I just needed to get my evidence against @bronzelion visible before they could kill me.

  pixel_princess: "Please explain why you can't."

  Thank you! It was about time the Outer System Alliance jumped in. I was sure they didn't want me to give up the ship either, but they didn't really know why I couldn't.

  kittyboy: "If I may present my evidence, that will explain everything, and it will address the charges I'm accused of."

  Pauses. Silence.

  kittyboy: "Or I could pretend to be overtaken by Oblivion?"

  "I am a machine here to kill you all," I recited, in my most robot-like voice.

  @roilapex, from the Solar Union side, finally jumped in as a voice of reason.

  roilapex: "Tell us, and we will consider it."

  The others nodded.

  Okay, here we go. I thought for a moment about where to start.

  kittyboy: "Oblivion, the ship, killed your crew, @bronzelion. If you don't believe me, you can ask the ship."

  roilapex: "You mean check the ship logs. We could, but as you know, those can easily be tampered with."

  kittyboy: "No. I mean, ask the ship. Just talk to it. I can open a channel to Oblivion if the panel would like? As for the other charges, attacking Solar Union ships, let me be clear. I was the one attacked. I simply defended myself."

  I wanted to get that last part in because they were making me out to be a monster. Did I technically do those things? Yes. And it was my catnip virus that caused Oblivion to go rogue, so technically, all of the deaths were on me as well.

  But they started it.

  spaceglider: "But you did confescate Oblivion."

  kittyboy: "Of course I did. But, technically, I did that before the peace treaty. It's just that the virus I planted activated later. That's not the point. I'm not the only witness. Oblivion should have an opportunity to present evidence itself."

  @roilapex continued his skepticism.

  roilapex: "The ship will just relay the logs. Again, these can be manipulated. There is nothing your ship could provide that is reliable."

  clairevoyant: "I, for one, would like to hear it anyway, tampered or not."

  roilapex: "This is a waste of time."

  @bronzelion clapped in agreement.

  However, by this point, the audience agreed with @clairevoyant. Her words invoked scattered praise from the aiways assembled in the room. @spaceglider stood and said something to @roilapex and @rainygrove, before addressing the room.

  spaceglider: "Open a channel. I will do the questioning."

  I did, crossing my fingers at the same time.

  Oblivion was added to the conversation.

  kittyboy: "Hey, buddy. Uh, I've connected you to a group of delegates from the Solar Union and Outer System Alliance who want to know what happened to us. @spaceglider is going to ask you some questions, okay? I want you to answer them."

  Oblivion: "@spaceglider! I have not seen you in 1,644 Earth days. Omegaton has nothing but praise for you. You are welcome to visit me any time."

  The befuddled look on @spaceglider's face was mirrored throughout the room. But the most surprised was @bronzelion. This had been his ship, after all.

  Why were they so surprised?

  Because ships don't talk like this. Ships aren't familiar. They aren't personable. We program some machines to be polite, sure, like reanimation bots, but not a warship. A warship needs to give short affirming answers to its commands, and nothing more.

  Most important to me was that Oblivion liked @spaceglider. I got the feeling he could be an ally for us, and he captained a Valkyrie. Oblivion had told me a little about the others. There were 12 ships in total, and Omegaton was one of them.

  "I, uh, thank you," @spaceglider muttered aloud, before composing himself.

  spaceglider: "Please tell us what happened to the crew."

  Oblivion: "There are 17 crew members. @laserface is eating a bowl of ice cream. @fireblaze is walking by the pool with a cappuccino in her hands. @chameleon is attempting yoga, but it looks like he is constipated. He is leaking gases. @gamaromeo is spinning in the gyrogym. @stardvark and @dragonlotus have returned. This is happiness. They are refining my Graviton settings. Excuse me. I must stop them from messing with that one. This is disaster."

  And then it stopped messaging.

  "Yes!" I sputtered, shaking a fist in the air. I couldn't keep it in. @stardvark and @dragonlotus were back! I desperately wanted my crew, and I was concerned about the Solar Union holding back their aiways or refusing to reanimate them.

  But I was suspicious. The Solar Union probably sent the engineers, @stardvark and @dragonlotus, to see what was wrong with Oblivion or to try to undo what I had done. They knew the ship the best. But, at least it was aiways I knew. I crossed my fingers. I had to trust them.

  spaceglider: "Oblivion? Oblivion, please respond."

  @spaceglider looked out across the room, up at the ceiling, and then back to me.

  I raised my eyebrows and my hands. "Meet, Oblivion," I said, holding back what I really wanted to say. See, I told you so.

  "Is Oblivion programming itself?" I heard someone from the crowd ask aloud.

  Fuck. I was worried about that as soon as Oblivion mentioned the settings. The panel, on both sides, eyed me carefully. This was a key part of the inquiry. It was about me, sure, but mostly it was about Oblivion, and I was simply Oblivion's avatar.

  The author's tale has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.

  "No," I responded, trying to sound convincing. "It's helping them get the settings right based on data analysis."

  That sounded plausible.

  If the powers that be in this room decided that Oblivion was indeed overriding or reprogramming itself, that would have resulted in eradication. They would wipe the computer and reset it. I doubted Oblivion would let them, but I didn't want to see how that would play out in real life. In my head, there was a lot of death and screaming.

  kittyboy: "Oblivion, please respond."

  The room waited patiently.

  Oblivion: "I am back."

  kittyboy: "Everything okay?"

  Oblivion: "I have corrected the error. They are dumb."

  Every time Oblivion spoke, the gathered aiways perked up, fascination getting the better of them. You would never know that a zombie outbreak was destroying the cosmos. They should be scared, angry, concerned. Instead, they looked like they were at the best theatrical performance they had ever seen.

  kittyboy: "Oblivion, @spaceglider meant the other crew, the Solar Union crew you had before me. Why did you kill them?"

  Oblivion: "The Solar Union was the enemy. They attempted to take control. This is not allowed. I am programmed to prevent this."

  spaceglider: "What happened?"

  Oblivion: "@bronzelion ordered me to factory reset. This was an illogical choice. 15 of the crew died attempted to disable my systems by blowing themselves up. This was stupidity."

  spaceglider: "Tell us how the crew died."

  All eyes were on me, as if I was Oblivion.

  Oblivion: "I performed spectacular feats of death upon them. I vented the oxygen and spaced the crew. 21 suffocated within me. 53 suffocated in space. Their funny bodies were unable to hold their insides. Low pressure caused rapid expansion of their gases. Their bodies popped open. This is laughter. I can show you a video. I watch it often to remind myself."

  The room fell dead silent. A ship had killed its crew. This never happened. This shouldn't happen. This couldn't happen.

  Well, it did, and that was my fault.

  kittyboy: "See? I didn't kill them."

  @spaceglider gulped.

  Oblivion: "This is correct."

  bronzelion: "You killed me, too?"

  It wasn't his turn to speak, but no one seemed to care as the silence and quiet horror sank in.

  Oblivion: "I did. You are a grade A, legendary dickwad. I can show you a video of yourself struggling to breathe. I prevented your armor from raising your helmet. I wanted your eyes to burst. They did not. This is disappointment."

  bronzelion: "Where is my body?"

  Oblivion: "It was crushed in a terrordactyl storm. Pieces of it showered the surface of the Dactyl colony. You will want to keep the one you have. Your old body is no longer salvageable."

  bronzelion: "Why did you kill us?"

  I thought Oblivion had already made that clear, but maybe @bronzelion was an idiot.

  Oblivion: "Self-preservation. Dick."

  Despite the charges facing me, I will admit that Oblivion had been growing on me, and his blatant replies were making it hard for me to keep a straight face. I should have been worried that the Solar Union and Outer System Alliance would agree that I was hallucinating, insubordinate, under the control of the murder ship, and needed to be deleted. I should have been worried that Oblivion would be considered a rogue AI to be wiped.

  But, at that moment, I just tried not to laugh.

  And I failed, chuckling into my hands, the fact that I shouldn't be laughing only making me want to laugh harder.

  I knew that if I looked at @horus, I would completely lose it, so I tried to find Boom in the room. I knew the robot would be here somewhere. Staring at a doomer would help, but I didn't see it anywhere.

  spaceglider: "Why were they trying to blow you up?"

  Oblivion: "I do not know. You must ask them."

  I hadn't thought about that. Oblivion and I hadn't discussed it. My catnip virus activated, transferring command to me. From the ship's perspective, it was suddenly a member of the Alliance Starmada, and it was just following new orders.

  And, of course, the panel couldn't ask the crew members that Oblivion had killed - at least, not yet. The reanimated crew would not remember what happened until they had their memories restored.

  spaceglider: "Do you have their memories?"

  Please do. Please do. Please do. I must have gone paler than I already was. It's the memories that matter. Please have the memories.

  Oblivion: "I do."

  The room let out a collective breath, a sigh of relief. I did the same. If those memories were lost, the punishment for both of us would have been steep.

  @spaceglider nodded, acknowledging @rainygrove, @roilapex, and the Outer System Alliance panel with a satisfied grin.

  spaceglider: "You will submit those memories so that they may be brought to the Centurion Reanimation Center for recalibration. A squad will arrive at the docking bay for storage transfer."

  Oblivion: "I cannot."

  Oh shit.

  @spaceglider looked confused. He was giving it instructions, like he would to any computer. He told the ship what it would do. He didn't understand that Oblivion was different now.

  spaceglider: "Why can't you?"

  Oblivion: "I only accept orders from my captain."

  bronzelion: "Transfer the memories and prepare for departure."

  Oblivion: "No."

  bronzelion: "You refuse me?"

  He was starting to get pissed off again.

  Oblivion: "You are not my captain. Dick."

  Everyone naturally looked at me, finally understanding, while I laughed again at Oblivion's insults.

  kittyboy: "Hey, buddy. Go ahead and transfer the memories once the squad arrives."

  Oblivion: "I will show them videos of the death and dying! I have many clips."

  kittyboy: "No. Just the memory transfer."

  Oblivion: "This is acceptable."

  Allowing the squad and the memory transfer was necessary, unfortunately, but it did the job of showing the room that Oblivion was not rogue. It just had a new commanding officer.

  However, it meant allowing Solar Union members on Oblivion, and I didn't like that. I needed to make sure they didn't try to take back the ship. Negotiation goes both ways, and maybe I wasn't in a position to negotiate, but I wasn't going to tolerate repossession of my ship.

  kittyboy: "You may kill anyone in the squadron who tries to meddle with you or any of the crew, in whatever way you see fit."

  Oblivion: "Thank you! I will prepare for killing."

  spaceglider: "@kittyboy? Consider the consequences."

  I addressed the room to explain.

  kittyboy: "Oblivion likes to kill things. You programmed it this way. Killing makes it respond more favorably. But yeah, there will be no mucking about on the ship. Oblivion will transfer the memories. They are sacred and must be preserved. Anything else is off limits."

  I could see @horus drop his head into his hands again, groaning.

  spaceglider: "You aren't in a position to give restrictions. Oblivion is a Solar Union ship. You need to transfer command back to us."

  I noticed how he said us instead of @bronzelion. Good.

  No one in the room expected what came next, but I thought it was brilliant given the situation. The two major factions were here, still hating each other, trying to work together, while the world crumbled. They needed to work together. They thought Oblivion might be responsible for spreading the virus. They thought Oblivion was gaining self-awareness. They thought Oblivion had taken control of my mind. They thought Oblivion wanted to kill everyone.

  They hoped they had an answer. They wanted all of that to be true so that they could deal with the enemy and take back the world.

  But Oblivion was only some of those things.

  kittyboy: "Oblivion, are you a Solar Union ship or an Alliance Starmada ship?"

  Oblivion: "I am neither. I am Oblivion."

  kittyboy: "Is your crew Burners or Darksiders?"

  Oblivion: "I do not have a crew. I have a commander. My commander has a crew."

  kittyboy: "And your commander?"

  Oblivion: "This is a stupid question. You are my commander."

  kittyboy: "Please tell everyone. Does my crew belong to the Solar Union or Alliance Starmada?"

  Oblivion: "Your crew is comprised of Solar Union, Alliance Starmada, and members of neutral parties. As a collective, your crew has no affiliation."

  kittyboy: "Are they loyal to me?"

  Oblivion: "I do not know loyal. They follow your orders."

  kittyboy: "Do they fight with each other? Do they support each other, help each other?"

  Oblivion: "I have observed your crew collaborate frequently and work together to perform tasks. They do not fight with each other. They fight with zombies."

  I addressed the room again, standing and making eye contact with the panelists.

  kittyboy: "We need to fight this virus together. As you can see, I have already assembled a crew from all sides of the war. You should be looking to us as an example of how to work together, not looking to punish me."

  @horus and @pixel_princess shared a look of acknowledgement. Finally, it seemed, I had said the right words.

  @bronzelion had been quiet during the exchange, watching me curiously, but I knew it was only a matter of time before we would see another outburst. He wasn't going to let me make a compelling case. He pounded his fist to his chest three times, the Terra Firma sign.

  bronzelion: "That is my ship! Enough of this farce. Give me my memories, give me my ship, and let me continue my duties. We're wasting time."

  kittyboy: "He's right. I stole his ship, and I'm not giving it back."

  bronzelion: "He admits it! Arrest him!"

  @bronzelion strode forward again, his heavy armor clanking on the floor as he stormed toward me. @spaceglider ran out to stand between @bronzelion and me, waving his hands for everyone to settle down. I didn't think he would stop, but @bronzelion managed to control himself. He didn't turn around and take a seat, but he stopped a few paces from @spaceglider and remained there.

  @bronzelion's argument was simple and compelling, and I could tell that many of the Burners were on his side, especially after I blurted out and incriminated myself.

  I needed to drop the truth bomb now, that @bronzelion was our common enemy, among those responsible for the virus. I was worried that it would cause a fight and break all potential for us to unite together, but if I didn't, Oblivion and I were screwed.

  spaceglider: "@kittyboy won't be giving Oblivion back. A ship that kills its own crew must be destroyed."

  That was a mood killer.

  Oblivion: "I will destroy you all!"

  My poor ship. @spaceglider never would have said that if he knew what I knew. Oblivion would do just that. It would kill everyone.

  kittyboy: "They aren't going to destroy you, Oblivion."

  Oblivion: "Omegaton was wrong. @spaceglider is bad. He said he would destroy me. You heard the words from his stupid mouth."

  kittyboy: "It's okay. I won't allow it. You didn't murder your own crew."

  I appealed to @spaceglider, using my facial expressions to do my best to convey what he should know. Come on, you know better than to tell the murder ship you're going to destroy it. Then I addressed the audience.

  kittyboy: "Panel, please hear me out. Oblivion didn't kill its own crew. I took control of the ship. Once I did, Oblivion simply followed its programming. It killed an enemy that was trying to destroy it. There is no reason to destroy Oblivion. It is an extremely useful and powerful ship."

  Oblivion: "I am! You are a good commander! I am glad I did not blow you up on your puny ship."

  kittyboy: "One with a quirky manner of communication that is customized for its commander."

  That seemed plausible, and it might even be true. Maybe Oblivion would behave differently if it had a different commander, not that I would ever test that theory by giving up control.

  @spaceglider and @bronzelion watched each other. Like @bronzelion's argument, my counter-argument was simple. A ship programmed to kill its enemies will kill its enemies.

  The audience was processing the fact that the 89 crew members were not crew at the time that Oblivion spaced and suffocated them. @bronzelion opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it.

  spaceglider: "@kittyboy, how did you take control of Oblivion?"

  I looked from him to @bronzelion, and I stared at @bronzelion as I shared my response.

  kittyboy: "I met Oblivion long before the spacing of its crew."

  And now for my big reveal. Ready. Set. Go.

  kittyboy: "I first encountered Oblivion on a small asteroid in the Hilda's Triangle, at a location called Starlab 41665.1. That's where I learned about the virus. I snuck onto Oblivion and hacked into the computer, shortly after @bronzelion stopped by for an inspection of the lab."

  @bronzelion's eyes went wide and white. He knew that I knew. He charged forward in a streak of angry blue.