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46: The Worst Ambush Ever

  The arrow whistled through the air with the distinct sound of impending regret.

  Reyn heard it before she saw it, and a lifetime of combat had taught her that sound meant move now, think later. She shoved Venn aside, stepping into the arrow’s path with the kind of timing that would have been heroic if it hadn’t immediately gone wrong.

  The arrow punched through her left shoulder with the speed of something that had been waiting all day to ruin someone’s afternoon. Pain bloomed, sharp and immediate, which was at least honest.

  ?Ambush!? someone shouted from the trees, which seemed redundant given the arrow.

  ?We noticed!? Randulph shouted back, already diving behind a conveniently placed boulder.

  Six figures emerged from the undergrowth with varying degrees of competence. Five humans in mismatched armor that suggested they’d robbed a theatrical company’s throwouts, and one troll as if at least someone had been taking this ambush seriously.

  ?Surrender, Crimson Hand scum!? the apparent leader announced. He wore what might charitably be called armor, a collection of steel and leather stitched together by a blind blacksmith.

  Reyn pulled the arrow from her shoulder with a wet sound that made Venn wince. Blood immediately started its escape attempt. She pulled on Rage to dull the pain. ?Do we look like Crimson Hand??

  ?Don’t try to trick us with your… your trickery!? This from a thin man with no armor, and hands that sparked with barely controlled lightning. ?We know you’re heading to the Capitol!?

  ?Everyone’s heading to the Capitol,? Venn said from behind her own boulder. ?It’s the Capitol. That’s where all the roads go.?

  ?Silence, criminals!?

  The sorcerer raised his hands dramatically. Lightning burst forth, crackling through the air with impressive fury before striking a tree forty feet from anyone important. The tree, which had been minding its own business, exploded into flames.

  ?Gerald!? the leader hissed. ?We talked about aiming!?

  ?I am aiming!?

  ?At what??

  ?The general…? the sorcerer said as he waved his hands about, ?area.?

  Gerald raised his hands again. More lightning. This time it hit a rock near Randulph, who yelped and scrambled away. The rock seemed unimpressed.

  ?You’re terrible at this,? Reyn said, pressing her hand against her shoulder. The bleeding was noticeable, but not immediately fatal. Rage would heal it in a few hours, but her shoulder was reduced.

  ?We’re bounty hunters!? the leader declared with wounded pride. ?Sworn to bring Crimson Hand members to justice!?

  ?Still not Crimson Hand,? Reyn said.

  ?That’s exactly what Crimson Hand would say!? The leader pointed directly at Reyn. ?Just look at you!?

  ?Have you never seen a Bormecian before, you imbeciles?!? Randulph pointed out.

  ?Shut up!? The leader nodded at the troll. ?Gorz, get them!?

  The troll stepped forward, and Reyn revised her opinion of the situation. Gorz was eight feet of muscle, tusks, and the presence of someone that ate his problems for breakfast and asked for seconds. He carried a club that looked like someone had convinced a tree to become a weapon through sheer intimidation.

  ?Nothing personal,? Gorz rumbled in a voice like gravel getting comfortable. ?Job’s a job.?

  He swung. Reyn dodged, but her shoulder screamed in agony from the sudden movement. The club smashed into the ground where she’d been, leaving a crater that would stand for decades.

  Good Deeds came up, but her left arm wasn’t cooperating. Rage could dull the pain, but a weak joint remained a weak joint. The parry was weak and sloppy. Gorz’s next swing caught her sword and sent it spinning into the underbrush.

  ?Reyn!? Venn tried to stand, but her bad leg folded immediately.

  ?Stand back,? Reyn said as she staggered on her feet.

  Gerald the sorcerer contributed another lightning bolt. This one hit his own leader’s shield, sending the man tumbling backward with his hair standing at attention.

  ?GERALD!?

  ?Sorry!?

  Gorz advanced on Reyn, who was now weaponless and bleeding. Reyn drew on Rage, feeling it pulse through her body as Gorz raised his club. Time seemed to slow as Reyn took a deep breath, focusing Rage.

  Gorz’ club came down toward her, but Reyn sidestepped it with ease. She kicked the huge troll in his side with an amount of force that surprised her foe and that would have antagonized her shoulder if it weren't for Rage.

  I will regret that tomorrow.

  Gorz swayed for a short moment, then laughed.

  ?You fight well,? he said.

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  ?Thank you. So do you,? Reyn replied, eyeing the distance to Good Deeds.

  Gorz smiled round teeth, and before Reyn could lunge toward her sword, the troll had grabbed her by her leg.

  The next she knew, Reyn flew through the air and hit the trunk of a giant oak with enough force to break straight through it. It cracked and creaked, and before anyone could react in a meaningful manner, the massive tree fell and crushed two of the bounty hunters.

  Reyn grunted and pulled a splinter from her side as she staggered up on her feet. She inhaled, drew on Rage, but Gorz was fast. Before she knew it the troll rammed into her, sending Reyn several feet back and tumbling.

  ?Reyn!? Venn cried, fending herself against the less able combatants.

  ?Bees and honey, that was a good one,? Reyn said, catching her breath. She got up on her feet and wiped blood from the corner of her mouth. ?Stay careful, Venn. Randulph, can you please help her a little??

  Gorz lunged at her, and Reyn pulled on Rage. It filled her very soul, surging through her body and mind. The troll had ditched the club, and a fist that looked more like a boulder came straight toward her face.

  Reyn stomped into the ground and screwed her feet into the mud as she caught Gorz’ fist with both hands. The ground gave way, and they slid back, but Reyn stood her ground and the troll vent into a halt. It blinked in surprise with its tiny black eyes.

  ?Strong,? he said.

  ?Thank you,? Reyn said. ?Mind letting us continue on our way??

  ?They pay. Gold is gold.?

  ?Even from idiots??

  ?Especially from idiots. They pay extra.?

  Reyn felt the ground shift underneath her feet as the two pushed against each other. ?What does a troll do with gold??

  Even Gorz were visibly gritting his teeth, not prepared for the opposition of a Bormecian Barbarian. ?Pay.?

  ?Pay for what??

  ?Stuffs, and things.?

  Gorz pulled his arm back. Reyn held on, leaving Gorz trying to shake her away from his hand.

  That’s when Randulph finally managed something useful.

  ?Would everyone please STOP!?

  The Suggestion hit everyone except Gorz, who shrugged it off like rain. The human bandits froze mid-everything. Gerald stopped mid-lightning bolt, which fizzled out with a dissapointed sound. The leader stood with his mouth open, about to shout another order.

  ?Finally,? Randulph panted. ?Gerald, was it? Drop your hands. Everyone else, drop your weapons.?

  They obeyed with wide eyes, not sure why they obeyed a bearded man who clearly had to be homeless based on his attire.

  Gorz looked around at his frozen companions, then at Randulph, then at Reyn who was still hanging onto his arm like an angry cat.

  ?Wizard not bad,? he said.

  ?He has his moments,? Reyn said.

  ?You not Crimson Hand.?

  ?No, we are not.?

  ?You not merchants either.? Gorz lifted his arm, so that Reyn came face to face with him. ?You fight against Hand??

  ?Kind of,? Reyn said. ?In fact, we are going to see their leader.?

  ?Why??

  ?To stop them causing more trouble in Vaelen.?

  Gorz considered this with slow deliberation. ?I fight Hand.?

  Reyn nodded. ?You are good at it, I am sure.?

  ?Yes. I come.?

  ?What?? Randulph said, losing concentration. The bandits started blinking confusedly.

  ?Come where?? Venn asked, still catching her breath from the fight.

  ?With you. Name Puff.?

  Reyn blinked. ?Puff? Isn’t it Gorz??

  ?Full name Puffelensteinbergersonn. Humans can’t pronounce. Puff easier.?

  ?But… your leader—?

  ?Never learned name.? Puff walked over to the leader, who was still recovering from being electrocuted by his own sorcerer, and picked him up by the armor. ?Barry, I quit.?

  ?You can’t quit! We have a contract!?

  ?For hunting Hand. They hunt Hand. I go with them.?

  Barry shook his head. ?That’s not how contracts work!?

  Puff tilted his head, which looked weird considering his lack of neck. ?How much you owe??

  ?Thirty silver.?

  ?Twenty to break contract.?

  ?Deal!? Barry said immediately, which suggested he hadn’t been paying Puff nearly enough.

  Gerald raised his hand. ?Should I… should I lightning them? As they leave??

  ?NO!? everyone shouted simultaneously.

  Gerald looked disappointed but lowered his hands.

  Puff set Barry down, collected his silver, then shouldered his club and walked over to Reyn. Up close, outside of combat, he was even more imposing. His skin was the green-grey of river stones, and his tusks had small decorative carvings that suggested an artistic side.

  ?Your shoulder need fixing,? he observed.

  ?Venn’s a Mage-to-be,? Reyn said.

  ?Venn can barely stand,? Venn said. ?And my magic’s still drained. If I had the right herbs…?

  ?I know plants,? Puff said and wandered into the forest, leaving the awkward scene of bandits and their former victims standing around wondering what social protocol covered this situation.

  ?So,? Barry said eventually. ?No hard feelings??

  ?You shot me,? Reyn said.

  ?Well, Kelvin shot you.?

  Kelvin, apparently the archer, waved apologetically from his tree.

  ?Could’ve been worse,? Barry continued. ?Could’ve hit something vital.?

  ?Everything’s vital when you need it,? Venn said with a pout.

  ?Philosophy!? Gerald exclaimed. ?I love philosophy! The nature of vitality is—?

  Another lightning bolt escaped, striking a bush that had done nothing to deserve it.

  ?Gerald, please,? Barry begged. ?Just… stop. Stop everything.?

  Puff returned with handful of leaves and moss. He chewed them into a poultice that he gave to Venn.

  ?This help.?

  Venn widened her eyes as she received it. ?It does.?

  She went over to Reyn and applied the smudge on the wound. It stung, then numbed, which was an improvement.

  ?Right,? Barry said, apparently deciding to pretend this was all perfectly normal. ?We’ll just… be going then. Different direction. Far from you.?

  ?Good idea,? Randulph agreed.

  ?Come on, Gerald.?

  ?But—?

  ?No but.?

  They left, their arguing growing more distant as they disappeared down the road. Reyn, Venn, Randulph, and their new companion Puff stood in the road, surrounded by scorched earth and confused wildlife.

  ?So,? Venn said eventually. ?We have a troll now.?

  ?Apparently,? Reyn agreed.

  ?Name Puff,? Puff said helpfully.

  ?I am Reyn,? Reyn said and turned to her companions. ?This is Venn, and that is Randulph.?

  Puff nodded. ?Mage and Wizard.?

  Turnip chose that moment to emerge from wherever he’d been avoiding the chaos, saw Puff, and chittered something that sounded like a territorial dispute waiting to happen.

  Puff looked down at the rabbit. ?Angry rabbit.?

  ?He’s not a rabbit,? Reyn said with a single shrug. Turnip approved.

  ?No??

  ?We’re not entirely sure what it is, but it is not a rabbit.?

  ?Good.?

  And so they continued toward the Capitol: a wounded Bormecian, a drained healer, an exhausted wizard, whatever Turnip was, and now a troll named Puff who’d just quit his job mid-ambush to pursue vengeance against the Crimson Hand for some reason only he knew.

  ?This is getting complicated,? Randulph muttered.

  ?You didn’t believe this was going to be simple?? Venn asked.

  ?I had hopes.?

  Behind them, smoke rose from Gerald’s various lightning victims. Ahead, the Capitol waited with its tournament, its Crimson Hand infestation, and its complete lack of preparation for a troll named Puff and a Bormecian named Reyn.

  Reyn touched her shoulder where Puff’s poultice was doing something that felt like healing but might have been mild fermentation. Either way, it was better than bleeding.

  ?Thank you,? she told Puff.

  Puff didn’t even shrug. ?No thank. Just sense. Wound no good for fighting.?

  ?That’s… Thank you.?

  ?Mhm.?

  They walked on, adding another unlikely companion to their unlikely quest, while somewhere behind them Gerald was probably setting more innocent foliage on fire in the name of law and order.

  The capitol, Crownport, was next.

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