What. Is. Happening?
Right now, I’m with my bag outside the hospital in front of a big ugly bus with paint ripping of its walls. My bag is slung around my shoulder but the weight of it doesn’t bother me because I’m busy...busy searching for someone. My eyes skim through the hundreds of patients and doctors finally landing on a secluded corner where security guards are gathered around. And through the gaps I catch a glimpse of the ash black hair I know all too well. Through which I had run my hands through in the rain.
In the past few weeks, I figured out she’s in special care sector which honestly breaks me a bit more. She was literally in the next wing and yet…yet she didn’t come to meet me knowing Serene, she’s good at sneaking out and all that.
So why didn’t she?
The thought hits me like a truck and I’ve to physically force myself to stay steady.
One of the guards get a phone call, moving away slightly to attend to it which gives me a better view of Serene.
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Same hair, same eyeliner and same silver ring she wears always. One thing has changed though. She’s talking and laughing with someone beside her. From a distance I can’t see him clearly but it’s clear he too, is a patient from the special care.
Seeing her this close to the guy, I feel an unwelcome pang of jealousy in my chest. My entire body burns with the effect of not running and pulling her into my arms right now. To demand answers. But I don’t…
I stay put like the stupid little coward I am…
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Don’t you think living is meaningless?
It’s either you care too much or you’re careless
And in both you’re the one in loss
When you see the with someone else from far across
Don’t you think living is meaningless?
When the person who loved you the most, now loves someone else
When you tried your best
But it was never enough, always less
Don’t you think living is meaningless?
When your body is alive, but your soul has left?
