A smile slowly appears on his face as he notices the eyes of the guy on the closest table completely gloss over, finally the first one is his, and soon more would follow.
He can’t wait for the mischief he’ll do once the whole Tavern is under his sway, and so he continues singing the tale of the Forgotten Hero.
—----
The Hero's eyes were locked on the crate,
He wondered what trial was today's Fate,
With a puff of smoke and a sudden flashbang,
A monster rushed forwards and its voice rang,
With a cry so deep that the ground shakes,
And claws bigger than tent line stakes,
A dragon appeared in all its glory,
How it was captured is another story,
Teeth like daggers and bigger than a troll,
Our Hero loses his bladder control,
He turns and run as fast as he can,
Running away without any plan,
The Dragon charges, its intentions are clear,
Accompanying it is an aura, that all fear,
The stink of a dinner, they long since ate,
From an appetite that any, Chef would hate,
Rotten eggs, brussel sprouts, baked beans and more,
Its breath, visibly rolled across the floor,
As the Hero ran he still had the sword drawn,
With every stride, from it another note was torn,
While such tiny sounds might not be loud,
They were having an effect of which he could be proud,
What he didn’t know was the Dragon wasn’t well,
And with each note, its arse pressure did swell,
Then all of a sudden, the Dragon just stopped,
From its behind, a massive fart popped,
Followed by a belly gurgle, that didn’t sound good,
Something unpleasant was happening, under the hood,
Squatting and squeezing, it unleashed its load,
The mess that landed, did violently explode,
It got under its back feet and caused it to slide,
Like a toxic brown surfboard ride,
Sending him towards the Hero, and the arena wall,
He was prepared to die, until the Dragon did fall,
Its front legs gave out and down slammed its head,
Confused and dazed but not quite dead,
The Hero felt an energy rising from the sword,
Giving him the might of a Kangaroo Lord,
He jumped forward and stabbed its eye,
Sliding all the way in, like cutting fresh pie,
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And the attack just kept on sliding,
Into its brain the sword was hiding,
The Commentator had been dramatically narrating,
Even the actions that were quite nauseating,
So the end of the fight was not expected,
To be so quick for a foe that's respected,
That they were left without words to say,
Until the smell reached their nose and made them pray,
With a wave of their hand and a spell spoken quickly,
Everything was gone, that was dead or sickly,
With booming applause and deafening cheers,
The Hero could see in the crowd, many spilled beers,
After a minute, complete silence fell,
Sudden and absolute like a death knell,
The Commentator explains that the Divine made this dimension,
As a much needed training intervention,
To ensure that entire Worlds weren’t defeated,
By making invading armies goals go uncompleted,
The Hero needed more power to play his role,
So here was a place to temper his soul,
The Kangaroos might had been earnt,
A sudden striking leap that was learnt,
But the sword had more to show,
Both the Harp and Whale left to go,
All three are needed for his protection,
To survive meeting the invaders detection,
The Harp was grace and flow,
Knowing when to move quick or slow,
Predicting trajectories and moving with style,
Reaching a state of impossible guile,
Foes not being able to land a hit,
As the Hero had already landed a crit,
The Whale is about his aura and presence,
Weight of his being, allows no nonsense,
A Goliath in stature, no matter his real size,
Just a look makes sure nobody tries,
To test his skills in a deadly duel,
As they know they’ll become crow fuel.
The Commentator then asks the Hero a question,
Without so much as a suggestion,
Which Trial would he like to complete,
To entertain those with a seat,
So come on and choose,
The crowd knows you won’t lose.
