GYOAT was annoyed. "????"

  What was the point of wishing for a peaceful apple orchard when it not only contained non-apple trees, hello, cocoa and coffee? "????????" but now, he was receiving system notifications that part of it was on fire! How? "????" This was a non-combat zone. Bees couldn't even sting you here, yet part of his precious soil was currently host to a flaming tear in reality.

  He chuffed through the trees, his heavy hooves thumping on the moss, and saw another annoying sight: Demons. "????????"

  The hellish intruders were smashing and stepping on perfectly good apples! How was Noobkitty supposed to make her famous pies if the fruit was squished into the dirt? This would not do.

  He followed the scorched path and found the source of the infestation. Near the portal, he found a woman who looked approachable, or at least, she wasn't currently trampling fruit. She was busy trying to strap a scorched beehive to a sturdy oak tree using a makeshift netting of vines.

  He walked up to her and said, "???????♀?."

  HnyThsl looked at the yak, her head tilting in confusion at the sequence of emojis that flickered into her mind. It wasn't a text chat; it felt more like a direct injection of intent into her brain.

  "Um, hello. I believe you are GYOAT," she said tentatively.

  "????????"

  "I see! Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I saw how you saved the town during the dragon attack, that was pretty amazing."

  "??????????"

  "I'm sorry about the beehive," she said, pulling a vine taut. "The demon portal put it in danger. I’m just trying to make them a hammock so they can settle back in."

  GYOAT looked at the bees and tilted his head. "??????"

  The bees performed a frantic, buzzing dance that translated roughly as: “Yeah man, weird cow girl saved the hive. Now she’s making us a luxury sky bed. She’s cool.”

  "??????, ???♀?????"

  "I'm glad you approve. I'm sorry about the demon gate... it’s kind of my fault," HnyThsl admitted, looking sheepish.

  The story has been taken without consent; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

  "????"

  The bees flew in front of her, vibrating aggressively at the yak. “Nah, it was a weird shiny coin! Our girl just touched the loot. She’s innocent, bro.”

  "??????????"

  "Um... she probably knows more than I do," HnyThsl said, pointing toward the mostly naked, red-skinned woman hovering a few feet away. In GYOAT’s opinion, bipeds always looked better with clothes on, even this cow elf woman looked a bit odd with lumps in the wrong places.

  "????????"

  The Succubus, whose name was Veloura, looked at the yak. "Are you talking to me, beast?"

  "?? ??????"

  "Why is there a portal?" the demoness snapped.

  GYOAT nodded and chuffed a cloud of steam.

  "Because we are supposed to be invading!" she shouted, her wings snapping open. "Why can't my troops attack? Why aren't my hell-flames burning these trees?"

  "??????????"

  "Seriously? No combat at all?!"

  The yak chuffed again, looking unimpressed.

  "How are we supposed to conquer this world if our legion can't even throw a punch?" Veloura landed, her hooves clicking on a rock. She whipped her tail, stomped her foot, and actually pouted. "This was my big chance! To be a war general! To be more than just a... a being of lust! I want to talk to the Admin!"

  Suddenly, music boomed through the forest. Lights flashed through the canopy and thick, theatrical smoke rolled over the moss. The ground vibrated with a pulsing beat, followed by the scream of high-pitched strings. The bees began to dance to the rhythm, much to HnyThsl’s confusion, she couldn't read their "interpretive dance" while they were headbanging.

  "????????"

  "This isn't my doing!" the succubus yelled, covering her ears.

  Out of the smoke walked a woman with a human face, cat ears, a twitching tail, and a strange, stringed instrument that looked like a futuristic lute. The music faded as she stopped playing. The woman looked strangely familiar, she had that face.

  She walked straight up to GYOAT.

  "Hi! Did you like the song?" she asked brightly. "My name is KitE. Could you direct me to ExpertBunny?"

  The group blinked at the newcomer.

  "I, um... got travel permission from her. She’s marrying my youngest clone-sister."

  "??????" GYOAT asked.

  "Yeah, Noobkitty! So you do know her! That’s great," KitE said excitedly. "Can you take me to her and her fiancée?"

  "????????????"

  "Fantastic! Thank you, Yak of Greatness," said KitE.

  "????????"

  "King... yak... world... time?" asked the Neko Bard.

  "Royal cow of world sand?" guessed the Demoness.

  "He's the Greatest Yak Of All Time, GYOAT," declared HnyThsl the Celf.

  "?????????♀???"

  "Admittedly, I did already know his name," HnyThsl said, blushing. "But I’m glad you’re happy with me. I hope to stay in your forest until I unlock my class."

  "?????????"

  "I'm a Druid in progress," she explained.

  GYOAT nodded solemnly, then looked at the Neko and the Demon. "?????????????♀???????"

  "Yes, please," said KitE, strapping her instrument to her back.

  "Fine, Yak. I will come," Veloura sighed, her dreams of conquest effectively neutralized by the power of 'Cozy Zone' physics. "Maybe this 'Admin' can at least explain why my fire is acting like a decorative nightlight."

  GYOAT marched the two toward town, leaving the Celf behind to sing to the flowers. He paused only once to watch HnyThsl taste one of the forest apples; she closed her eyes and smiled at the flavor. GYOAT approved. Someone with a good sense of taste was always welcome in his orchard.