Charley did not, in fact, sleep that night. He lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, replaying the conversation with Tenuk over and over in his mind. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw galaxies swirling, felt the power thrumming through his veins, experienced the overwhelming sensation of being connected to everything in the universe.
At 3:47 AM, he gave up on sleep entirely and made himself a pot of coffee. Then he did what any reasonable person would do when faced with an impossible decision: he made a pros and cons list.
PROS OF BECOMING A GOD:
- Unlimited cosmic power
- Get to protect an entire universe
- Dragons exist in Universe 2
- Would finally use my astrophysics degree
- Can tell Dave to shove his clipboard where the sun doesn't shine (multiple suns, actually, since I'd be a god)
- Might actually feel like my life has purpose
CONS OF BECOMING A GOD:
- Enormous responsibility
- Could screw up and destroy billions of lives
- Would fundamentally change who I am
- Still don't know if I'm qualified
- What if I'm terrible at it?
- What about Lyla? What about Sam? What about my normal life?
He stared at the list for a long time, then added one more item to the PROS column:
- Would be the coolest thing anyone from my high school has ever done
At 6:30 AM, he dragged himself into the shower, then got dressed for his shift at Buy Less Groceries. The irony of potentially becoming a god while still having to work retail was not lost on him. If he accepted Tenuk's offer, would he still have to show up for his shift? Would he call in sick? "Sorry, Dave, can't make it today, I'm busy protecting Universe 2 from cosmic entropy."
The thought made him laugh, which turned into slightly hysterical giggling, which made him wonder if he was having a mental breakdown.
His shift was brutal. Charley moved through the morning in a fog of exhaustion, scanning items mechanically, smiling at customers without really seeing them. Sam took one look at him and said, "Dude, you look like death," but Charley waved him off.
During his break, he sat in the depressing employee break room and googled "how to know if you're having a psychotic break" and "can stress cause hallucinations." The search results were not helpful.
His phone rang. Lyla.
"Hey," he answered.
"Hey. I've been thinking about our conversation the other night." Her voice was soft, tentative. "I think we need to take a break. Some space. For both of us to figure out what we really want."
Charley felt a strange mix of relief and sadness. "Yeah. That makes sense."
"You're not upset?"
"I am, but I also think you're right."
They talked for a few more minutes, navigating the awkward territory of a relationship in limbo, then said goodbye. Charley sat in the break room, feeling oddly numb.
The afternoon crawled by. Dave appeared periodically with his clipboard. Sam tried to cheer him up with Game of Thrones theories. Charley went through the motions, trying not to think about the decision looming over him.
His shift ended at 4:00 PM. He clocked out, said goodbye to Sam, and drove home with a sense of impending doom.
He arrived at his apartment around 5:00 PM, ordered Chinese food because cooking felt impossible, and collapsed on his couch. He was staring at his phone, trying to summon the energy to do anything, when the air in his living room began to shimmer.
The figure that materialized was a woman, tall and elegant, with silver hair that floated around her head as if she were underwater. She wore robes that seemed to be made of starlight, and her eyes were a deep purple that reminded Charley of nebulae. She was glowing with a silver light that made his apartment look dingy by comparison.
"Charley Novak," she said, her voice melodious and slightly amused. "So you're the one Tenuk has chosen."
Charley sat up slowly, his heart pounding. Having a glowing goddess appear in his living room was somehow more unsettling than meeting Tenuk in a parking lot. This was his space, his sanctuary, and she'd just invaded it like it was nothing.
"Can I help you?" he managed.
"I am Zephyra, Goddess of Universe 7, and I wanted to meet Tenuk's successor before the ascension ceremony." She floated closer, examining him like he was a specimen under a microscope. "You're younger than I expected. And more... ordinary."
"Thanks. I'm really feeling the divine love here."
"Don't be sensitive. I'm merely observing. Tenuk has always had peculiar taste in successors. His last choice was a philosopher who spent most of his time contemplating the nature of existence rather than actually protecting anything."
"What happened to him?"
"He ascended after two thousand years. Decent run, though he did let a few civilizations collapse due to his excessive navel-gazing."
"That's not reassuring."
"It's not meant to be. Being a Protector is difficult, and most candidates fail spectacularly before they figure it out. But that's part of the fun." Zephyra circled him slowly, and Charley felt exposed, like she could see through him. "I can read your aura, you know. You're curious, ambitious, and desperately unhappy with your current existence. You'll say yes to Tenuk's offer."
"You don't know that."
"I'm a goddess. I know exactly that. You're a very simple book, Charley Novak. Large print, lots of pictures, probably a pop-up section."
Charley bristled. "That's rude."
"I don't have to be polite. I'm merely stating facts." She smiled, and it wasn't entirely kind. "I like you, though. You're going to be terrible at this job, but you'll be entertaining to watch."
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"Why does everyone keep saying that?"
"Because it's true. Try not to embarrass yourself too much at the ceremony." With that, she vanished in a shimmer of silver light, leaving Charley alone in his apartment with the lingering scent of ozone and stardust.
He sat there for a long moment, processing what had just happened. His Chinese food arrived twenty minutes later, and he ate it mechanically, barely tasting it.
At 7:30 PM, there was a knock on his door. Charley opened it to find Tenuk standing in the hallway, still glowing but somehow looking more tired than before.
"May I come in?" Tenuk asked.
"Sure. Fair warning, my apartment is a mess, and I'm having a crisis."
"I gathered as much."
They sat in Charley's living room, surrounded by posters and collectibles and the detritus of a life that felt simultaneously too small and too complicated.
"I met Zephyra today," Charley said. "She materialized in my living room and told me I'm going to be terrible at being a god."
Tenuk sighed. "Zephyra has always been... direct. Don't take her assessment personally. She said the same thing to me three thousand years ago."
"And were you terrible at it?"
At first, yes. I made mistakes. Let my emotions cloud my judgment. Nearly caused a war between two species because I misunderstood their cultural practices. But I learned, improved, and eventually became what my universe needed.
"How long did it take?"
"About five hundred years."
"That's not encouraging."
"It's honest." Tenuk leaned forward, his expression serious. "Charley, I'm not going to lie to you. This will be the hardest thing you've ever done. You will make mistakes. You will doubt yourself. There will be moments when you want to give up. But you will also experience wonders beyond imagination. You will watch civilizations flourish, see beauty that would make you weep, and know that you played a part in protecting something vast and precious."
"What if I say no?"
"Then I find another candidate, and you return to your life. Buy Less Groceries, Lyla, wondering what could have been."
Charley walked to his window, looking out at the parking lot where this had all started. "I'm scared. Terrified I'll accept and fail spectacularly."
"Are you happy with your life as it is?"
"No."
"Then perhaps this is your chance to find out what you want."
Charley thought about his degree gathering dust. About Lyla, who deserved someone who could love her without reservation. About the endless monotony of scanning groceries.
And he thought about standing in space, feeling the universe respond to his thoughts, experiencing purpose he'd never felt before.
"If I say yes, I need you available for questions. Because I'm going to be completely lost, probably for the first few centuries."
Tenuk smiled. "I cannot promise to always be available—the Creator's Realm is different. But I will guide you when I can."
"And if I'm truly terrible at this, causing more harm than good, you'll replace me."
"I promise."
Charley took a deep breath. "Okay. I'll do it. I'll be the God and Protector of Universe 2."
The words hung in the air. Then Tenuk's glow intensified, and Charley felt a surge of energy wash over him—like being plugged into the universe itself, like every atom in his body was suddenly aware of every other atom in existence.
"The ceremony is in two weeks," Tenuk said. "We begin your training tomorrow morning. Prepare yourself, Charley Novak. Your life is about to change in ways you cannot imagine."
"Can I still work my shift tomorrow? Because I really don't want to leave Sam alone with Dave."
Tenuk laughed. "Yes, you can work your shift. But after tomorrow night, you may find that scanning groceries feels somewhat... mundane."
"More mundane than it already is? That's impressive."
After Tenuk left, Charley sat on his couch, staring at his hands. They looked the same—slightly calloused from work, with a small scar on his left thumb from a childhood accident. But soon, these hands would be capable of shaping entire worlds.
He pulled out his phone and texted Sam: "Something big is about to happen. I'll tell you everything soon."
Sam's response came immediately: "You're being weird. Is this about Lyla?"
Charley smiled. "No. It's about me. Finally."
"Proud of you, man. Dave's going to be pissed."
"That's just a bonus."
Charley spent the rest of the night researching Universe 2, though he quickly realized that Google had no information about parallel universes that actually existed. He tried to sleep but couldn't, his mind racing with possibilities and fears.
At 7:00 AM, he got up, showered, and dressed for what would be one of his last shifts at Buy Less Groceries. He felt oddly nostalgic about it, even though he'd spent the past two years complaining about the job.
When he arrived, Sam was already there, and they spent the morning shift talking about Charley's plans. He kept the details vague—"a research position," "using my astrophysics background," "can't really talk about it yet"—but Sam seemed genuinely happy for him.
At 11:00 AM, Charley was restocking the cereal aisle when the air shimmered again. This time, two figures materialized: a man and a woman, both glowing with different colored auras.
The man was short and stocky, with a red glow that pulsed like a heartbeat. He had a beard that seemed to be made of actual fire, and his eyes were the color of molten lava. The woman was tall and willowy, with a green glow that reminded Charley of forests and growing things. Her hair was made of vines and flowers, and her skin had a bark-like texture.
"So you're the new guy," the man said, his voice like grinding rocks. "I'm Kragg, God of Universe 5. This is Sylvara, Goddess of Universe 9."
"We wanted to meet you before the ceremony," Sylvara added, her voice like wind through leaves. "Tenuk's choices are always... interesting."
"Is everyone going to keep saying that?" Charley asked, abandoning any pretense of stocking cereal. "Because it's starting to feel like an insult."
"It is an insult," Kragg said bluntly. "You're mortal, inexperienced, and from what I can tell, completely unprepared for what's coming."
"Kragg, be nice," Sylvara chided. "He's nervous enough without you making it worse."
"I'm not trying to be nice. I'm trying to be honest. The job of a Protector is brutal, and most new gods don't last a century before they either ascend early or get replaced. This kid looks like he'd struggle to protect a houseplant."
"I've kept several houseplants alive, thank you very much," Charley said defensively. "Well, one. For a few months. Okay, it was a cactus, and it died, but that's beside the point."
Kragg laughed, a sound like an avalanche. "I like him. He's got spirit. Stupid spirit, but spirit nonetheless."
"Why are you all visiting me?" Charley asked. "Is this some kind of hazing ritual?"
"We're curious," Sylvara explained. "New Protectors are rare. Most of us have been in our positions for thousands of years. When someone new joins our ranks, we like to... assess them."
"Assess me? Like a test?"
"More like a preview," Kragg said. "We want to see if you're going to be an ally or a liability."
"And what's the verdict?"
"Too early to tell. But you've got guts, I'll give you that. Most mortals would have run screaming by now."
"I'm still considering it," Charley admitted.
Sylvara smiled, and flowers bloomed in her hair. "You'll do fine, Charley Novak. Trust yourself, and don't let Kragg intimidate you. He's all bluster."
"I am not all bluster. I am appropriately blustery for my position."
"We'll see you at the ceremony," Sylvara said. "Try not to embarrass yourself too much."
"Why does everyone keep saying that?"
They vanished, leaving Charley alone in the cereal aisle, surrounded by boxes of Cheerios and existential dread.
The rest of his shift passed in a blur. He restocked shelves on autopilot, his mind spinning through everything that had happened, everything that was about to happen. Dave barked orders at him, customers complained about expired coupons, and Sam kept shooting him concerned looks from the register.
At 6:00 PM, he clocked out, hugged Sam goodbye with a promise to explain everything soon, and drove home in a daze.
He sat in his apartment as the sun set over the parking lot where his life had changed. The ceremony was coming—Tenuk had said it would be soon—and after that, everything would be different. No more Buy Less Groceries. No more mundane existence. He'd be responsible for an entire universe.
Charley Novak felt something he hadn't felt in a long time:
Hope. And terror, sure. But mostly hope.
He didn't know what to expect. He didn't know if he was making the right choice. But as the last rays of sunlight faded and the stars began to appear, Charley knew one thing for certain:
His life would never be the same again.