On the moon, a skeleton is slumped over in a chair.

  In Columbia, Sherman Chex sits down in the chair he’s been provided. It collapses.

  All three of the people he’s meeting with turn to look at him.

  Alexander, the man in white, narrows his eyes.

  “Hold on, let’s call him. I’m sure he’ll settle it.”

  Virgil, the one in blue, rolls his eyes and leans forward in his chair, his voice calms.

  “We haven’t seen him in four million years! Why would he pick up the phone?”

  Alexander pulls the phone off the wall and stares at the numbers.

  “Oh, wait. He never told me his new number.”

  The woman in red, Suzanne’s eyes open wide, and she smiles brightly.

  “Ooh! Let’s call his wife! I haven’t spoken to her in a while!”

  Alexander rolls his seat away from the telephone as she spins hers towards it.

  7 - 4 - 2 - 4

  1 ding.

  2 dings.

  3 dings.

  Suzanne puts the phone up to her ear. A loud hissing noise comes from the other side, as if a snake picked up the phone. After a few moments, a woman’s voice comes through, though not loud enough for anyone else to hear.

  ..?

  “It’s me!”

  ..!!

  “Yeah, it’s been almost forty! Time flies!”

  ..

  “Actually we were just about to ask you about him.”

  ..

  “Huh, that’s a long time..."

  ..!

  “Wow! I never knew you could do that with tomatoes!“

  As they continue to talk, Virgil has a question for the man with orange hair. He poses it in an accusatory tone.

  “What exactly is one of you doing in Columbia? Do you have a death wish?”

  Sherman Chex is shocked.

  “Sir, what do you mean by that?”

  “You... whatever Rich called you. Says he’s almost gotten rid of every last one of you.”

  Virgil slams his hand into the wall for dramatic effect. A chair falls from the ceiling, which Chex decides to sit on.

  The lady that Suzanne is on the phone with questions the loud noise, but Suzanne says that her idiot brother’s causing drama again.

  Sherman Chex is confused.

  “Sorry, could you explain who Rich is, please?”

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  Virgil spins around in his chair a single time.

  “no”

  Virgil stares and frowns. He lifts his arm up, and as he lowers it back down, a glass shape slowly turns into a mug in front of him. He takes a sip, and his frown remains. He throws the mug through the wall, which it doesn’t hit.

  “Leave for like 5 minutes. We have to figure out what to do with you.”

  After time passes, Sherman Chex walks back into the room.

  Virgil’s palm is covering his face, Suzanne is spinning in her chair, and Alexander’s exhausted.

  Alexander raises his hands in the air.

  “Okay, let’s try this again.”

  He puts his hands back on the table and sighs.

  “Well, this meeting WAS about how to deal with another one of you coming down to Columbia.”

  The other two nod. Virgil is frowning.

  “The first thing you did after waking up was blow up a museum.”

  Sherman Chex shakes his head.

  “Sorry, but I was trapped in there with a bear!”

  “Not a bear.”

  “I had no other options!”

  The man in blue moves closer.

  “When we checked the tapes, you were wearing purple!”

  Chex looks down, he is clearly ashamed.

  “I’m sorry, there were no other clothes to wear...”

  Alexander shoos the other two out of the room and starts an interrogation.

  “Please, walk us through what happened in the museum.”

  “Well, first, I was in a museum exhibit, so I broke out of it.”

  “Okay, why were you in a museum exhibit?”

  “I don’t know.”

  “I see.”

  “Then, the curator went to call The Orange. After that, I sat there for a while waiting for him to come back, and he never did. When I went to leave, I saw the Not-Bear, which then attacked me.”

  “Sorry, how long did you wait for the curator to come back?”

  “Seventeen hours.”

  “... Got it.”

  “Well, I heard a hissing sound, which I, for some reason, immediately knew was a gas leak.”

  “Wait, you immediately knew it was a gas leak? How?”

  “It was like I saw it, sir.”

  “Hmmm.”

  “Well, after that, I caused an explosion, which led to the sprinklers turning on and washing me away.”

  “Hmmm, is that it?”

  “Yes, it is.”

  Alexander walks out of the room and a conversation can barely be heard on the outside.

  They all walk back into the room and sit in their respective seats.

  Alexander speaks first.

  “My idea was to try and keep you as far away from Rich as possible, but the others have different ideas.”

  Alexander slides his chair out of the way as Virgil moves to fill the space.

  “I think we should just throw you at him and see how quickly he kills you.”

  Chex is unhappy.

  “Sorry, what?!”

  Virgil looks away

  “They didn’t like it, so it’s not on the table anymore...”

  Suzanne slams her chair into Virgil's, sending him spinning through the wall. There is no hole or damage to the wall, as he passed through it without interacting with it. She is very excited to share her idea.

  “Good news! We decided to throw you at him and see if you could beat him!”

  Sherman Chex’s face looks like it’s about to fall off.

  “Ma’am, that’s the same exact thing, isn’t it?”

  Suzanne smiles and gives a thumbs up.

  “Yes!”

  Sherman Chex is distraught.

  “Sorry, How is that a different idea?!”

  “Glad you asked! First we throw you at smaller problems to see if they kill you! It’s logical!”

  “Wait, but, what?!”

  “That’s the plan!”

  Alexander speaks up.

  “Sorry, he’s not going with me. I don’t want him on my team.”

  Virgil moves back through the wall, it’s still completely undamaged.

  “I don’t have a team, I handle the public facing parts of the Orange. Like the oranges..”

  Suzanne is ecstatic.

  “Hooray! My team all died fighting a gigantic snake! That means you’re the first member of my new team!”

  She stretches out her hand for Sherman Chex to shake.

  He’s reluctant.